Tag Archives: peace

Molehills vs Mountains

I’m sure you have heard the phrase ‘Don’t turn a molehill into a mountain’

meaning: don’t make your problems bigger than they are.

But which is more dangerous?

The thing about mountains is they’re huge. You can see them from miles away…

Molehills, on the other hand, can often trip you up because you don’t notice they’re there until you’ve twisted your ankle.

Nobody climbs a mountain by accident.

Molehills seem to just be there at the wrong moment.

People plan for mountains.

I’ve never heard of an expedition up a molehill.

When you climb a mountain you tend to have support – people around you.

When you find a molehill, you don’t get a team together.

People see mountains as a challenge.

People see molehills as a problem.

People travel across the world to see mount Fuji, Kilimanjaro or Everest.

Molehills are on nobody’s bucket list.

So maybe we’re getting it wrong. Maybe we should turn our molehills into mountains because that way we see our problems as challenges, things to achieve. Instead of trying to tackle them on our own, we plan for them, get a support team around us, prepare for them and most importantly of all, we don’t let them trip us up.

Another thing about mountains – they have a great view from the top 🙂

Have a great week

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Let it go – with hypnosis

let it go hypnotherapy coventry

There is an old saying ‘being angry at someone is like trying to kill another person by taking poison yourself’

When you are angry at someone, or something, you don’t hurt them, you hurt yourself. What is the point of your anger? Does it help? Does it make you feel better? Does it achieve anything? If the answer to these questions is no, then the best thing to do is to let it go. Sometimes that’s easier said than done though, so how can you make it easier? Well, my choice would be by using Hypnosis.

I posted earlier in the week about one method that you can use to self hypnotise. There are other methods available and I will post more examples as we go along, but for now, give the eye fixation method described previously a try. Once you have achieved a nice state of relaxation you are ready to work on letting it, whatever it is, go.

Think about an image that represents the thing that you want to let go. For example if you did poorly on a test and you are angry at yourself, you might want to put get a picture of your grade on a piece of paper. When you have it clearly pictured in your mind, shrink it in size and imagine a bubble forming around it. Your bubble can be clear or coloured, sparkly or plain, that’s entirely up to you. When you can imagine the bubble, when you know what it looks like, think about holding it in front of you and blowing on it. Really give it a good blast of air so that it floats off into the distance. Follow it with your minds eye as it gets smaller and smaller, until it finally get so far away that you can’t see it any more and it entirely disappears from view. Notice how much better you feel now that it has gone from your mind.

Then when you’re ready, take a big, cleansing breath, wiggle your toes and fingers and only when you’re ready,

open your eyes.

It can take a few goes for your subconscious to take the hint and realise that you want to let go of this thought forever, so if it pops back into your mind, don’t worry, just take a a few minutes to go through the process again.

As with all of these types of techniques, you may find that it takes a little practise for it to work well for you, and that’s OK. It’s a bit like exercise or learning to play an instrument, you have to train and practise to get good at it.

So, let go of any anger, guilt, jealousy or any other negative emotion and find a little peace and happiness today 🙂


Filed under Happy, inspiration, Mental Health, Peace, Positivity, Psychology, Relaxation, Self Help, Self Hypnosis

Self Hypnosis – Eye Fixation

Eye (2)

Would you like to be able to hypnotise yourself?

There are several methods for achieving this perfectly natural state. What I talk about here is one such method, often called Eye Fixation. The process detailed here will not affect any change in itself, i.e. you will not suddenly lose weight/quit smoking/be a confident speaker just because you have self hypnotised, but it is a skill that you can learn and then use in conjunction with other things to help you achieve those and many other goals.

James Braid developed this process. He was one of the original Hypnotists – in fact he coined the term hypnosis – and he specialised in eye treatment so it’s no surprise that his initial methods of inducing hypnosis would involve the eyes and fixing their attention.  

Quite simply what you do is sit comfortably in a chair with your head facing forward. Without moving your head, look upwards to the ceiling and find a point that you can fix your eyes on. It should be a bit of a strain, but not too uncomfortable. Then imagine that your eyelids are getting very heavy and that you NEED to close your eyes. This might sound a bit silly, but your imagination really is the engine that drives hypnosis, so imagine the eyes getting really tired and think about how nice it will feel when you close them. You might want to imagine a light shining in the eyes, or maybe a dry breeze blowing across them and again it just makes you think about how nice it would be to close them.

All the time that you are thinking about this, keep your eyes fixed in that same position without wavering or moving or allowing your eyes to relax. Keep your head and eye position in the way that ensures the eyes become tired.

Then, once they are ready to close (usually after about 30 seconds or so), you let them close and that is the initiation of your hypnosis. 

To make yourself feel even more relaxed it’s good to imagine a time when you felt completely at ease – maybe it’s when you’re curled up in bed in the morning, or when you’re dozing off in front of the TV. You might even want to imitate this by making all the muscles in your face and neck go loose and limp. 

One of the ways I make myself even more relaxed is to imagine that I’m standing on top of a set of stairs going down to a secret garden. There are 10 stairs in all, and as I go down each one I feel myself getting more and more relaxed….twice as relaxed with each step…. until I finally get to the bottom and go into the beautiful garden.

As I said before, this self hypnosis method will not change anything on it’s own – that’s where the therapy part of hypnotherapy comes in – but it will give your mind time and space to slow down, and that is valuable in and of itself. In some ways it is like a self guided meditation and carries a lot of the same benefits – calmer mind, inner peace, better sleep etc

I hope you give this method a try.

I’d love to know how you get on, what your relaxing place is and how you find it…


Filed under Development, Happy, inspiration, Mental Health, Peace, Psychology, Relaxation, Self Help, Self Hypnosis

You’re not Perfect – and that’s OK

feel better with hypnotherapy

In the UK it’s the time of year that the A level results are released. Some 18 year olds will be thrilled that they have the grades they wanted to go to University, or to go for a course they wanted to do. Others will be devastated. They believe that their life is over.

They are wrong

Depression has been a hot topic of news this week because of the sad loss of Robin Williams. Some people seem to be angry or disappointed in him because he couldn’t stand to be alive any more. Some people are taking their pain out on those close to him, blaming them for not doing more.

They are wrong

Some people are beating themselves up for not being better, doing better, trying harder, working more….

…….for not being perfect

They are wrong

I’m not saying you shouldn’t try to do your best – Of course you should. You should try and be the best person you can be each and every day of your life. But you should also forgive yourself when you fail to achieve these goals sometimes.

Nobody is perfect – and you’re not Nobody!

So, give yourself (and those around you) a break. We all make mistakes, we all fall down, we are all a little broken. If you come across someone who is a little bit more broken than others, show them a little more care, give them a little more help, a little more latitude – even if that person is yourself.

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Be someone who makes you happy.

how to be happy

How often do we blame someone else for making us sad or angry or frustrated?

How often do we say that somebody is driving us crazy?

How often is that true?

I would argue that the answer to the last question is never. Nobody has the power to control how you feel – that’s up to you.

Now, before you all start shouting at me, telling me ‘it’s not as easy as that’, let me say – I know. Letting go of the things that upset your happiness is hard, it takes work and practise and can sometimes feel impossible, but it can be done.

The first thing to do is to be honest with yourself, accept the fact that you a flawed person who is not perfect, and actually believe that that’s OK. You don’t have to be perfect. Nobody else is either, and that’s OK too.

Next you have to try to do the things that make you happy, and to not do the things that make you feel guilty. That’s not to say you have to be perfect (see the first point I made) but that you have to be OK with your imperfections.

Thirdly, you might want to try meditation, particularly Mindfulness. It shows you that you are not your thoughts and emotions, and you can separate yourself from them. Just because an angry thought flits across your mind, you don’t have to become angry – you can let it go.

On paper, that all looks relatively easy, but it’s not. It takes time, persistence, patience and diligence and many people give up along the way. My advice would be to get help. Join meditation classes, try a little therapy (in my opinion CBT and Hypnotherapy would be most effective), spend time with people who have the same goals as you.

Whatever your path to happiness, you’ll find that other people or things can make a difference in the short term, but true happiness comes from you.

I hope you find a way to make you happy. I’m still a work in progress, but maybe I’ll meet you on somewhere on the journey if our paths cross 🙂

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Welcome to the Weekend

Don’t you just love the start of the weekend?

If you work Monday to Friday then Saturday is a sacred day. It’s your first day of the week where you can do what you want (assuming you haven’t got other responsibilities that create a timetable for you). You can lie in bed till way past the time the alarm will be going off on Monday, or you can get up early and make the most of your free time – it’s up to you!

You can spend the day reading, listening to music, catching up with friends, watching TV, walking in the park, making a great meal, shopping, painting, writing – You can do exactly what you want – and that is a Joy.

The main thing the weekend gives you is time. Time to do what you want. I wonder how we can best use that time to make us feel better in ourselves and for the rest of the week.

For those of you that follow this little old blog of mine, you will know that my main preoccupation is health – more specifically mental health. I think if we can work on positive mental health the rewards it gives us every day, far outweigh any time or effort we put in and the weekend is the perfect time to take steps to keep us going strong.

The thing I would encourage everyone to do this weekend is take a little exercise. It doesn’t have to be strenuous, just a little walk if you can manage it. Take a walk in nature, no headphones, no phone, no internet, no distractions. Take a little walk, smell the air, feel the wind, see the sights, hear the sounds and just be. Exercise is good for your body and mind, pumping blood, oxygenating your cells and clearing out toxins. Being in nature is good for your mind – creating space, being in the moment, taking a quiet moment to just be.

What ever you decide to do, enjoy your weekend, your sacred Saturday. The day when Monday is far enough away to not be a concern and Friday is already a fading memory.

Take care of yourself and those around you.

mental health coventry

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