November 12, 2014 · 1:56 pm
Are you lucky? Do you want to be more lucky? Here’s how….
Let me start by saying I’m not a superstitious person.
I don’t believe in rabbits feet or four leaf clovers bringing good luck nor do I believe walking under ladders or across the paths of black cats bringing bad luck.
If you see a black cat walk in front of you, the only thing it means is that there is a black cat trying to get somewhere, if you have a rabbit’s foot just remember that it wasn’t very lucky for the rabbit!
Having said that some people appear to be much more lucky than others – I bet you know someone who is always winning competitions or raffles, always gets a good hand at poker or just has cool stuff happen to them.
So what sets them apart?
There have been several studies on this and the findings all seem to point to one thing…
Take a chance.
People who appear to be lucky tend to be more social and are open to opportunity. They tend to be more optimistic people who believe that good things will happen, so they take a chance. The more chances you take, the more likely you are that some of them will pay off.
Then a little psychology tends to kick in. Have you noticed that when people remember the past they have a tendency to see it through rose tinted glasses? Summers were always hotter and longer, Christmases were always better, people were nicer and had more respect….Well that’s what we do with opportunities – we remember the one’s that paid off and forget those that didn’t turn into anything.
So imagine a friend that takes a chance every day. Maybe one in 10 of those will pay off – so that’s about 3 good things that happen a month. Now think of a friend who only takes one opportunity a month – they may only have one good thing happen all year. It’s about the same ratio of good to bad but one friend will seem a lot luckier, particularly if they only tell you about the good things that happen.
So, if you want to be lucky say yes to every opportunity that comes your way – who knows where it could lead.
Today I saw an email asking for people to be extras in a zombie movie – I sent them an email and I’m going to be filming at the end of the month! How cool is that!
What can you say yes to today?
Maybe you might want to follow this blog on wordpress, facebook or twitter – You might find something that interests you and then, who knows where it could lead?
Filed under Blogging, coaching, depression, Development, Happy, Health, hypnosis, inspiration, Mental Health, Motivation, Positivity, Psychology, Self Help, Stress, Worrying
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August 23, 2014 · 1:29 pm
Have you ever done the lottery?
Have you ever imagined what you would do with all the money if you won?
We’re you utterly devastated when your numbers didn’t come up?
Did you know that the odds of getting all 6 numbers in the lottery (without the bonus ball) are almost 14 million to one? Did you also know that in the UK there are about 124,000 heart attacks each year. That means that you are a lot more likely to have a heart attack on your way to buy your ticket, than you are of actually winning? Does that stop people? NO! and nor should it, though you might want to think about a low fat diet and a bit of exercise!
The thing is, we don’t always think logically.
We don’t weigh up the odds and take the most sensible course of action, particularly when our emotions get involved. Worry, Phobias, Fear and Anxiety are the negative sides to this. CBT or Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is a therapy used to help people with these issues. One of the things it tries to teach people is how to look at the risk factors – the chances of things happening. For example, is someone has a fear of flying they may believe that if they go up in an aeroplane, that there is a high risk of them dying. In reality that risk is incredibly small. If they start to look at the numbers they will soon realise that there is much more danger to them getting to and from the airport, than they will ever face when the plane is in the air. This can be really hard for people to accept though, because they focus on their fears.
Do you ever play slot machines? If you play occasionally there is a chance (though small) that you may come away with more money than you put in. If you play regularly or consistently (particularly on the same machine) then the chances of you ‘winning’ reduce with every game you play. The machines are created to make money, therefore the odds are built in that it will take more than it gives out. Do you think this stops people from playing? Take a look around any large casino and you will quickly see that the answer is No, because people focus on the wins.
Sometimes if someone has been hurt in a relationship they will avoid getting into similar relationships as they believe the same thing will happen again. Their focus is on the Pain.
If you have a fear or anxiety about something happening it’s worth trying to think about it logically, and if you can’t do that then speak to someone who can put it into a different perspective for you. Therapists are useful for this as they have no personal agenda, but friends and family can be great too. Listen to what they have to say, weigh up the odds, focus on the positive and ask yourself…
What are the chances?
Filed under inspiration, Mental Health, Motivation, Peace, Phobia, Psychology, Stress, Worrying
Tagged as anxiety, CBT, chance, fear, growth, help, mindfulness, Motivation, phobia, Self-Help, Subconscious, thoughts, worrying, www.talktherapies.co.uk